I won times 2!

So....


When I posted my last blog in March, my husband and I found out just how effective getting healthy can be! We found out right before I posted my last blog that I am pregnant! This has been a very, very long road for us. We tried fertility and that certainly didn't work and then we tried prayer. Good old fashioned, "When God wants it, it will happen." And that is exactly when we got pregnant!


So needless to say the first trimester is over now and that is why I am posting. Not because we were keeping it a deep secret as all of our friends and family already know. But because I was just so tired and out of it for those few months that my day consisted of work, nap, make dinner, eat dinner, lay on the couch and go to sleep again. This interrupted by Church stuff and going out when necessary. That was about it.


So now, I am in my thirteenth week. We have seen the baby on ultrasound twice! And heard it's little heart beat! I am full of energy again--so much so that Saturday I prepped my veggie garde, planted 13 tomato plants, two squash plants, 6 green peppers, 6 japanese eggplants and watered all 5 gardens. Plus a trip to the garden fest, Home Depot, and CVS. I did then take a 2 hour nap, but it was necessary as we then went out with our friends for dinner in Waltham!


I am down to barely any naps during the week but still going to sleep at a reasonable hour as before baby, I was a night owl and midnigh was my usual bedtime!


We have yet to make changes to the house but once we get going on baby room plans, I will keep you posted!!!

Our little munchkin (9 weeks)

A little perfect timing...

     So after my post yesterday, and Bible study that went right along with that post last night, I come along this blog that hits the nail exactly on the head...http://www.purposefulhomemaker.com/

     Gee, God loves divine appointments and giving us signs....we just have to keep our eyes open!

Being quiet and thanking God

     I've started a Bible study this week on Psalms. The first week's lesson in on being silent before God. listening to Him and then thanking Him for all of the blessing you've received even if you are going through storms in life. I have slowly gotten into the habit of talking at God and not talking with Him. This has led to lukewarm prayer times and a feeling of disconnectedness. So last night after I completed my Bible study, cuddled with hubby during T.V. time, gotten some chores done and was finally in bed, I said the Our Father as always and then I quieted my mind, shut my mouth and sat still and quiet before God. It was hard to do but I realized I'd been waiting for God's plans for me, without listening for them. Well. how can He tell me his plans if I'm not listening?
     So I waited....and it wasn't long before God talked to me--with passion, with conviction, without condemnation but He definitely schooled me. I listened, I heard, I realized what I was totally unaware of.  I was not being totally honest with Him or with myself. I said, I will follow your plans....but I wasn't giving everything over to Him. I handed him my career, but not my marriage...not like I should. I handed him my Church life, but not my life with family and friends. And it's not like I actually controlled this stuff either. I'm the go along type. I go along with life and live it. I don't think about it, I don't consciously change anything. I just live. So sometimes listening to God opens up a whole can of worms. It gives us much to think about. It reminds us that He cares and listens to everything even when we don't think He is. We just need to give Him a chance to talk too. So I feel asleep listening to God and not talking at Him but responding to Him.
     Then I woke up, and instead of complaining that it was Monday (a little storm but one we all face every week), I thanked Him. It started my day off on a better foot. And when I realized I'd overslept by ten minutes, I wasn't angry. I just said, Oh well, shorter shower. And I went on my way. Thanking God this morning helped me focus on the positives in life and not the tiny minuscule negative things I face. Go figure.

Pride-I hate it.

There aren't many things I hate in life...but I sure hate pride.
  Here is the background on how pride snuck up on me tonight:
     My dear friend's baby shower is tomorrow, and I love her and her husband very much. And I love their baby girl already, even though I haven't met her yet! And I am so excited! I love blessing the people that I love! Especially the selfless, caring, sweet, wonderful people that I know! So I finish wrapping her present tonight when I get home from going out for another one of my dear friend's birthdays (busy weekend!)
     Anyway, this will not come as a surprise to those who know me, but I put together a basket for her. I love making baskets! They are so pretty and so personal because you can really put thought into what you get for someone! I have made wine baskets and "kitchen" baskets for wedding showers, a "honeymoon survival" basket for a friend (that honeymoon weekend made a baby! hehe) and I have made baby gift baskets before. Its fun for me, and I really love and enjoys watching my friends and family opening them and enjoying their gifts...and I love knowing that what is in the baskets are useful gifts. It is a way that I show my love. But I don't do it with pride, I do it with all of the love in my heart...
     Now back to the basket I made. As I sat there yesterday and put all of the gifts that I picked out thoughtfully into the pretty little basket lined with pink gingham...I thought of this couple at Church. Now, we all have them...we loath ourselves for loathing them...but we have them...those people in our lives that we secrectly compete with and secretly feel contempt for. There may be no reason for it, they may not even know you exist...but they do exist and for some reason, you feel that you must compete with them...even if you don't talk to them, or know much about them...there they are...
     So I have this couple...and I'm wrapping my dear friend's gift...and I think to myself...I hope my gift is better than hers...and this is horrible...I am not this person...I hate this part of my person...and then I think...well it has to be prettier--because its a basket...ugh...and I pray. "God, please stop the pride. I do not want to be prideful" These people don't even know I exist (by the way, I don't think my husband 'competes' with them...just I do). These people have their own life, and family and careers and everything else. This is my battle and my struggle.
     And even as I sit here, I hate myself for it. And I'm disgusted with those thoughts...and I have no idea how to get rid of them. So tomorrow, I will still probably feel it. And I'll gloat if my gift is prettier and better...and if it isn't...I don't know what...I'm competing with a person that doesn't even have me on her radar...and what's more? Its not like she is richer, or prettier, or further ahead in her career....and the things she has...I don't want....her husband isn't more successful or better looking or any nicer than mine, and yes, she has kids, but instead of focusing on having a family I got my Master's degree, because I knew I didn't want to do it in the opposite order (I don't have 'insane' stamped on my forehead).  I'm totally happy with my life, I know that God has blessed me and even just tonight I was telling my husband that I had everything I wanted and I was completely happy with out lot in life....so why do I feel these pangs of jealously and this awful retched feeling towards this poor woman?
     And the only answer I have is....the devil made me do it...do I give him too much credit? Maybe...but since there is no logical reason...and I know that I should be happy for this couple...that is my only explanation for it...so tomorrow...who knows if this pride with turn me into the vain, competitive, snot that I am right...but I hope not...I hope the hour and a half of prayer and worship before the baby shower will do me some good and snuff this out. Here goes nothing!

Oh and here is the basket I made...just cause its pretty!

Posting this a little late but needs to be said

     On Friday of last week I heard something very disturbing on the morning news. A high school about a half hour away from me was putting on the play "The Laramie Project"--a play about Matthew Shepherd, the young man who was tortured and murdered for being gay in 1998. A church from Kansas decided that wherever this play was being produced, they would picket. They stated in an interview that "you may not talk about God without talking about his hatred."
     First of all, let me say, that as a high school teacher, I give major credit to the students of that high school. Most kids are afraid of homosexuality because it is different. They are just as scared of being different as any person on the social edges and if they say that homosexuality is okay, or tolerated, then they are setting themselves up as well. Kids are scared of having the spotlight on themselves but those kids that participated in that play are amazing for volunteering to be center stage on an issue that is so controversial!
     Now, I am disgusted by that Church. I am a Christian. I am proud to be a Christian. But I am not proud that those people call themselves Christians too. Jesus would tell them to go home. He did in the Bible when the prostitute was being persecuted for her sins. He told them that if they were without sin they could throw the first stone (John 8:2-11 ). This is the Jesus I know and follow. When Jesus came to earth this is what He said to us: "As for the person who hears my words but does not keep them, I do not judge him. For I did not come to judge the world, but to save it." John 12:47
     Jesus sits on the throne of judgment. I do not. Judges that are appointed by the governing courts of a country are entitled to judge. I am not.
     Jesus told me to love. He said "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." (John 13:34)
     So why are there Christians out there preaching this message of hate? It makes me sad. It makes me really sad. It makes me really sad for Matthew Shepherd and his family and friends. It makes me really sad for anyone who has been a victim of a hate crime. It makes me really sad for people out there who struggle with their sexuality and feel condemned by Christians.
     The majority of us don't hate you. God did not teach us a message of hate. God taught us to love you. God did not teach us a message of judgment. It is not our job to judge.
     I'm not going to get into my beliefs on the subject because that is not the point of this post. The point is--this church full of Christians from Kansas should look at themselves before they preach "God's message of hate." As Christians we should daily preach God's message of love. As I remember very clearly, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16
     This scripture does not include a footnote that says, "except for homosexual people" it says "the world." So we must love all the people in the world too, even if we don't agree, even if we don't like someone, even if someone's moral choice are not our own. It doesn't matter. We must love the whole entire population because God did and told us to as well.
Here is the link to the article: http://www.boston.com/news/local/articles/2010/10/28/as_framingham_high_stages_controversial_play_a_teachable_moment/

Frustration turns into Calm

    I was just so frustrated with a situation that my husband and I are dealing with now and was ready to chop someones head off. I made a call, left a message and within a few minutes I got a call back from someone who was able to quickly calm my fears, my stress and my anxiety. I have known this woman since High School, and she was always one of the nicest, sweetest girls I know and to see her turn into this reassuring, calming, sweet women is such a blessing! I love when living angels come to us to show us God's grace and mercy! I voiced my fears, my frustrations and my concerns and my friend was able to more me towards the resolution that I felt was the leading of God! It is so amazing to feel the peace wash over you as you trust in His plan for everything!

Update

Just an update on everything.

My friend felt a lot of comfort this weekend during her Grandfather's funeral, so if you prayed it was felt and we are all thankful.

Everything is going well for us! We need more prayer between Wednesday and Friday so it is definitely appreciated!!!!

I was definitely tired on Sunday and things bettered themselves quickly so that was great!

Once again if you need prayer leave a comment! God Bless!

Prayers Please

     My best friend's family just lost their grandfather this week. He was a great man, funny, kind, sweet, loving and always their to give you a wink and nudge! What a light-hearted wonderful man he was! We knew that he was going to pass away soon and God gave her family the gift of one more week with him where he was lucid and awake and able to tell them how much they meant. Please pray for his 7 children, 14 grandchildren and countless children in-laws and others who will miss Pape's. We love you!
     Another friend is going through a crisis as well. I don't know major details because I haven't been able to get a mutual friend on facebook this week, but please just pray for her healing and comfort in this trial in her life.
     This weekend my husband and I are also awaiting big things,  please keep us in your prayers as well! (Especially on Sunday morning!)
     If anyone has prayer requests, leave them here so we can all pray together for the needs of God's people.


I hope everyone has a great weekend and we will keep you posted on the big things!!!
God Bless!

Phillipians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Election Day

     Well, as I sit here tonight after cleaning out my desk (yay! I finally got it done!) I am watching the election results and wonder why you voted today. I voted to protect myself and my family from higher taxes and the loss of public services and as always I voted because my vote matters! As a Christian, many people automatically assume that I vote Republican. And I know that many Christians do vote Republican and that is fine for them. But as I have grown and matured, I see more issues than just Pro-Choice or Pro-Life. Yes, I believe babies are babies from the moment they are conceived. But I also believe that as God gave me free will, he gave all of us free will and we can't make the hard choices for everyone else...it isn't my business...I'm just here to tell you what I believe and why (if you ask) and you can make your own decision. So with that said, this is my little political ditty and then you won't hear it from me again.
     I am an independant. I do not believe as a member of a middle-income, working class family that the Republican party has my best interest at heart. Therefore, I do not vote on party lines, I vote on issues and who stands closest to my beliefs on an issue. I do tend to lean to the left but that is because I find the Left is more about people than business and more supportive of social issues. The Left seems to want to take better care of this country's people--they are not for free hand-outs--they are for helping people when they are down. And I do know that people take advantage of that, but when the Right is in power business gets  A LOT of free hand-outs and they definitely take advantage. Anyway, I like my money in my pocket and unlike the wealthiest 1% of our citizens--I NEED my money in my pocket--so why would I vote for people that have money and like protecting their friends who have money?
     Now onto the point that Republicans are Christians and Democrats are not...first off..I don't know what anybody is. Someday we will all know who is and who isn't when we meet them in Heaven. Someday, we will all stand before God Himself and He will tell us if we've done right or wrong. So I am not to judge. Because maybe that Democrat that you are voting against is a God-fearing, Born-Again, Christian Soul and you are voting against who God wants in office. I do not, nor have I ever, voted based on Religion. I also try not to talk badly about anyone who was voted into office because civil government is necessary and divinely ordained by God (Rom. 13:1–7), it is ultimately under God’s control. So we will vote and God will move those that He will to vote for His Will to put the people in office that need to be there. I truly believe that whatever happens, God is in control and He knows the ultimate outcome--He is afterall the one who wrote the book!
     So please, if you talk among your family and friends about this election--or any election--please do not assume that because someone is a Christian they are Republican, and don't assume that someone who isn't a Republican isn't a Christian--because both assume that you know a person's inner thoughts and soul and well none of us know that! Hope you voted because one vote does make a difference! And last but not least and probably one of the most important points--God Bless America!

God Moves

     I just got home from a Praise, Worship and Healing evening at Church. At the very end of the service the Pastor turns to me and says, "Young lady will you please come up here?" Yeah....God called me out. He knew I needed prayer, He knew I needed guidance and love and movement in my life. So He called me out in a room full of strangers. And then I remembered, those strangers are really my family in Christ. And they love me, because Jesus died on the Cross for me--for all of us--to make us a family.
     Like the leper, I needed God's touch tonight. I didn't receive any specific word, or direction and we didn't see a great healing or lightning or a dove. But I felt love. And love is what I needed.
     I grew up in a Church filled with the movement of the Holy Spirit and I spent 5 months in YWAM watching people be healed and be saved. But all that happened years ago. It has been a long time since I have felt God move personally in my life--and tonight He did and thats all He wanted to do, was to let me know that He stills moves in my life and He is still invested in me. I missed Him and I was lonely. Sometimes we are in a desert and we're supposed to be there for some reason. And when the rain comes it is amazing.
     This has been a hard week. I don't ever let on when I'm upset...I do, but not in healthy ways. I don't let it affect me because I'm used to letting everything roll off my back. But this week, people who were supposed to be my friends have disowned me, people I trusted broke my trust, people who I never said a bad word about spoke badly of me....people who I thought were worth it, said that I wasn't. And on top of all that, I'm hormonal, and moody and struggling with my hurt back. And then hubby and I are struggling because I'm moody and hormonal and struggling with my back...its all connected right?
     And God loves me so much, that He called me out and let me cry in front of strangers, who prayed for me, and laid hands on me, and were generous with blessing me...because God knew that I needed to know that I was worth something. He is so amazing and wonderful and perfect in all He does. I am so thankful that He is my God and my Savior and my Lord. He is the Prince of Peace and the King of Kings and the greatest Healer the world has ever known. And He died on a Cross for little old me...amazing.

Hmmmm....

     Did you ever arrive somewhere, just to ask yourself "How did I get here?" This could be about a car ride, a walk, a place or a moment in your life. Lately I've been asking myself this more and more. And it isn't always a bad thing when I ask myself. It could be something as simple as having a nice lunch with a friend and you wonder, how did I get so lucky to have such a good friend?
     There have been a lot of changes in my world recently. From graduating with a Master's degree to planning a family, to even buying new furniture things have changed very rapidly this passed year. They say that the first year of marriage is hard--for us it was a breeze. They say that when you have children its hard--well we aren't there yet. But sometimes things in life can just stress a marriage out. And some days we are at that point where we asked ourselves..how did we get here? How did a silly conversation turn into a fight? How did a conversation a week ago about the dishes case the evening to end so badly? How did the traffic that we are sitting in turn into us not talking to each other through the entire store? Stress in a marriage is natural and there are ups and downs. We have been together long enough to know that sometimes we will hit a rough patch, there will be a whole week where we fight everyday and then there will be a great patch where we don't fight for months and we are so in love during those times. When we get to that point where we say "How did we get here?" Whether it be good or bad, sometimes we forget to reflect back on the journey that led us to that good point or that bad point. And we forget that we get through our bad parts and move onto those parts that make our marriage as amazing as it is.
     So I sit here in the kitchen and wonder, how did I get here? Somedays I ask Why am I so tired? or How did I get so lucky? And tonight its, why am I so tired? why am I blogging instead of cooking dinner? how did teasing become an argument? and is my friend coming to worship with me tonight? We ask ourselves so many questions throughout the day. Sometimes we need to lay it at the foot of the Cross. Sometimes we need to take a break and be mindless so we don't drive ourselves crazy with the questions. And sometimes we need to examine how we got somewhere.
     For us, we struggle sometimes because we spent two years of our marriage with me in grad school and we are still majorly getting outselves back into rhythm. We also struggle because we walked out of a "lets just live our lives" phase into "wife in grad school" phase into a "planning" phase. We really enjoyed living with the come what may attitude and now we are trying to adjust. So we struggle, we bicker, sometimes we argue. But we make up everytime and we figure it out. And once the "planning" phase is over we will be able to look back and ask "how did we get here?" and we will cherish the journey and smile.

God's Love for Us

http://www.incourage.me/2010/10/holy-dance.html

I just read this post today and it touched my heart. How many of us walk through life, day in and day out and forget that God loves us?

Take a moment right now and listen to His voice. He whispers to us all day long and we, being the busy little humans that we are, forget to listen. This wonderful post reminds to do just that. Americans are probably some of the busiest people in the world and we rarely have time to listen to those that are right in front of us. Kids calling to us, "Mommy, Mommy" or in my case "Miss, Miss." Husbands, wives, friends, parents, nieces and nephews, bosses, coworkers, all day long we are bombarded from the people in our lives and the media and advertising, and music. We tend to block out half of what is right in front of us...no wonder we forget to listen to our still and silent Creator. Yet he is there, whispering, encouraging, sending little signs, and sometimes when we are lucky, yelling and knocking us over the head with a message.

So today, take my post as a sign. God is talking to you and He wants you to listen. He is telling you that He loves you, He cares for you, He wants to talk to you, He longs to be at the forefront of your life. Don't forget about Him, because He never forgets about you.

God Bless and look for the Sunset because our Jesus did that and that is a glorious thing!

So let us call today Whispering Wednesday and remember who whispers in our ear!